Friday Apr 21, 2023
Your child’s reaction when upset is often a mirrored response to your reactions when you are upset or triggered. Do you like what you’re seeing?
Your child is a mirror of your reflection.
And no, I don't mean physically, although that may be true too! What I mean, more specifically, is your child is a mirror to your ability to maintain your regulation, to manage your triggers when you become frustrated or upset. Is what you're seeing something you are pleased with?
Now, of course, our kids will need time to learn regardless of how well we stay calm during their big feelings but your consistency of patience, kindness, empathy, and understanding matter! Even when it feels like it isn't sinking in.
On the road to learning how to self-regulate (or calm/manage big feelings when upset, disappointed, embarrassed, nervous, etc) your child first learns from you.
What is your natural (and highly patterned) response when you are upset? Do you tend to yell, threaten, bribe, use a little more physical force than is needed, etc?
The next time your child becomes upset, whether it's from you saying no or because a sibling took a toy or won't share, watch the response that happens. Does it look similar to yours?
If you are ready to learn to manage your triggers and/or resolve patterning you have around certain behaviors and do it in a way that doesn't result in mom guilt, burnout, overwhelm, etc. DM me "triggers" and I'll send you some specific strategies.
Connect with me here: https://www.instagram.com/kailijozeiher/ or if you'd prefer email at kjzeiher@gmail.com.
Special Time ebook & Tame Your Triggers Audio have both been upgraded to MELTDOWN MANAGEMENT Mini Training! Get it here → https://view.flodesk.com/pages/64406aa91df9ae473e5a55e3
XO
Kaili
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